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feels so good

March 19, 2010

well, hello!  i want to succeed today in breaking the silence on this blog.  you see, i’ve drafted 5 posts that have not made publish.  i’ve wanted something to follow the sadness post that preceeds this but nothing has hit the mark.  i may take that down.  i miss my sweet little journal about the questions and explorations of life.  today i seek to go back to my commentary on what is, around me. 

spring time is beginning here in texas.  there has been a lightness in my air over the last month.  this week has been all sunshine and the bluest skies. 

i began this last week attending Yoga in the Park.  never have i seen Houston stand so beautiful as the view of downtown from downward dog with sunshine on my back and stark blue sky crystaling in my vision.  over these last few incredible months yoga has been and continues to become my everything.  it’s my breathe, it’s my love, it’s my clarity.  i really should write about my yoga… i keep wondering what it is i have available to teach…

well… i put my kids class on the calendar!  that’s right, i’m playing teaching family yoga every Saturday!!!!!!!!   i decided to make it a donation based class rather than charging tuition.  for me, this opportunity is about learning to wear the hat of teacher, sharing love, and learning to inspire, clown and spread joy to parents and children. 

i worried my first class would not fill but much to my delight and surprise i had 11 kids show up.  i am amazed at how naturally my teaching flows.  i forget parents are in my circle of animal friend.   i fully transform into what my imagination creates us to be.  during our first class we learned the framework of the ancient yogis who lived in the forests.  we became them and visited our favorite animal friends, who rafted down the river with us at the end of class.  last week, we travelled to africa by surfing, riding hot air balloons, riding magic carpets, boating, riding the massage train.  after we arrived, our animal friends took us on a safari.  the adventures are endless!   

i am honored by the mom who’s eyes filling tears showed me the gratitude she felt as she thanked me for class and the joy her children take home.  i am encouraged and supported by the mom who, after their first class, asked if i could come teach at her son’s school. children progress from shyness the first week to bursting with personality and skills to show us the next.  i am overcome by the blessing of watching these bright lights grow and shine right before my eyes!!!!!!  last week i taught them to Om, Namaste, and they agreeably went into shivasana.  yes!  i am on the path of helping to teach them to love themselves, their bodies, each other, their parents, their neighbors, those who are different and those unique differences, animals, veggies and the earth.  yippieedidooooooo! 

my next endeavor is to develop an empowerment class for teen goddesses, or tweens, or whatever pop culture is calling girls in junior high school and high school.  i’m calling them goddesses.  i mentioned this idea to my teacher and she is thrilled.  i also want to take my kids class to a shelter.  oh yippee! 

i feel so good.  those 4 small words do not contain the volume of goodness i feel… it’s hard to believe or describe but i’ll try… i started my period today (sorry, it’s relevant) with no symptoms of pms.  in fact, the last few days i’ve felt glowy.  i wondered about this ease of appreciation of each delicate moment of life and physical delicious, knowing i would ordinarily be feeling some physical discomfort that AF was coming.  i am sleeping again after 2 years of insomnia nonsense.  i am successfully weaned from caffeine and energized by the clear head of caffeine free life.  i won’t patronize you by trying to say the 17 days it took me to get there were dreamy (they were more than uncomfortable).  i don’t miss my coffee.  in fact continuing to drink it while weaning was difficult.  my mind is serious when it makes a decision to stop something.  i love my herbal teas that keep my ritual burning. 

two weeks ago i visited a naturopath.  she’s like the missing link.  she shares my philosophy about food, medicine and lifestyle, and has a medical education.  she’s close to my age.  she’s a mom.  she’s formerly vegan.  she had The China Study sitting on the bookcase in her office.  she’s practiced yoga.  she’s basically at the top of awesome.  she spent 2 hours learning everything i could think to tell her about my experiences with medical care and life.  she was delighted by my success with using garlic as an antibiotic.  she can work me for optimizing health and treating dis-ease in a way that is consistent with my philosophy – so SO nice.  we reviewed the blood work from my last physical with the MD.  i learned that the normal range for those results was based on the average American… umm…… not exactly a comforting measurement.  we talked about my diet and how i’ve felt with vegetarian w/ dairy, vegan + fish, and vegan.  she confirmed that 100% vegan is not what’s best for me based on my blood type and my experiences.  she confirmed my allergy to dairy.  she thinks no nuts for me.  she playfully scolded me for being nervous about soy.  she listened to my body.  she confirmed my ideas that i should be on a probiotic and added a daily dose of flax oil to my mix.  she also gave me an herbal tincture and some herbal vitamins.  love.

oooh!  with the motivation and help of some AWESOME sister friend gardening GODDESSES i have created the beginnings of my spring vegetable garden, eeeeee!!!  we dug out an area of my yard that is 5 ft x 6 ft, tackled some snakes and a tree stump… oh yes we did!  we used the cinder blocks from my compost-FAIL to create the boundary.  i planted yellow squash, zucchini, green beans, arugula, strawberries, oregano and basil.  i’m seeding tomatillos… mmmm summer salsa.  i transplanted what’s still living from last year’s summer garden – onions, swiss chard, rosemary and lavender.  in a few weeks i’m adding TONS of pepper plants.  i’m also going to add tomatoes when i am comfortable the warmth is here to stay. 

i’ve been cooking less than i care to admit.  mostly roasting veggies and beans.  i am in love with a simple salad of spinach, avocado and kalamata olives with Bragg’s Healthy vinaigrette.  i’ve been eating this for lunch virtually every day of the last 3 weeks.  i’ve also been impressing people with my variation of the VCON chickpea patties.  i tend to add nooch and cut the bread crumbs.  one favorite way to serve this delish is with spaghetti squash and marinara loaded with mushrooms and onions.  last weekend i had mom over for lunch when i was craving this incredible hemp seed burger.   i made the burger foundation of the chickpea cutlet (+ nooch and sans bread crumbs), added finely chopped onions, celery and carrots, and flax meal.  i served them on seeded bread with lettuce, tomato and avocado, and roasted sweet potatoe fries on the side.  mom and i were in heaven.  

so… hmm… what else?  i am dreaming.   my vision has returned with clarity.  i have found my next vacation – circus yoga school and a shakti workshop in upstate new york!  i can’t wait!

i want to share one last thing before i go.  i’ve been seeing a new yoga instuctor.  i’m in awe of him actually.  he’s amazing and my body is changing enormously.  his energy is soothing.  i am considering studying with him next.  a few weeks ago he was talking about the (arguably) impossibility of quieting the mind.  my mind does not stop.  period.  while i would like to experience the benefits of meditation, i haven’t wanted to practice.  i do not enjoy struggling with requesting my mind to stop.  one of my yoga friends says he does not want his mind to quiet.  he quite likes his mind.  funny how i like pleasure and my friend likes what his mind says.  my teacher said that the mind will never stop, so instead of trying to stop it, maybe we could learn to ignore it.  that’s what he does.  he says the fastest was to exhaust yourself is to pay attention to the chatter of the mind.  so, let’s ignore the mind………. do cartwheels……… and make frog sounds.

One Comment leave one →
  1. pumpkinface permalink
    April 2, 2010 10:13 am

    whooo hooo she is back! hello lady! glad that you are back to writing its good to hear you and know how you are doing!

    love ya!

    ~a garden goddess (oh yes i am)

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